Thoughts on Dominance, Labels and Style
Does your Dominance – either what you practice or what you strive for – have a label? How do you view your style of Dominance? If you do not use a label why?
First and foremost, I am not an expert. I’ve never claimed to be an expert. I learn something new every time I dive deeper into the rabbit hole that is this wonderful lifestyle. I do use an authoritative voice because I am Dominant and I make no apologies for it. I will use the pronouns that I’m comfortable with. I write and even text, like I talk in real life and I speak from the heart. I offer my opinions and insights that I have gained from 15 plus years of experience and through trial and error. If I offer insight, or sometimes even instruction, as it is from the mindset of my Dominant philosophy, which is primarily that of Daddy Dom. I’ve done this project before and some of you may be familiar with some of my writing in the past. This is a rekindling, friends. A resurgence and reclaiming of what has been lost to me.
What do I strive for in Dominance? This is gonna shock a lot of you I suspect, but it’s harmony. I want to take the chaos of life and shape it into an immovable object of safety and security. I will use the structure that my submissive and I formulate from negotiation and communication to create a very real safe harbor creating for the both of us safety and security. I’m not perfect, I am not god and I’m not infallible, but I will strive to provide balance and support in my Dominance through the structure she craves.
My style of Dominance is multifaceted. I shape my style of my Dominance to the needs of my submissive. How do I shape my Dominance? Through open and honest negotiation and communication we will establish the structure my submissive needs and lay the groundwork for mutual kinks, interests and hard limits. If something is not agreed upon, it will never happen. Let me repeat this again, if something is not agreed upon, it will never happen. From how we formulate rules to how we play to punishments, everything will be laid out and in the open. It is never etched in stone. Renegotiation can be opened at any point through the course of our relationship. I am innately a caregiver and a sadist. I am equal parts Gomez Adams and the sadist lawyer from The Secretary. I enjoy the corporeal and mental punishments that come from breaking my structure and I enjoy them deeply. There is little in this world that can match the release of endorphins as I lay that heavy thudding paddle across glowing red cheeks.
Labels. I gotta be honest with you. I hate labels. If we were to put modern labels on everything that encompasses my style Dominance, I am a primal sadist pleasure Daddy. A further Dominant philosophy I value is Taken in Hand. I do modernize this dynamic into my Dominance. Taken in Hand can be defined very simply, as a consciously and consensually Dominant-controlled sexually and socially exclusive monogamous relationship in which the Dominant’s power is real and for the purpose of creating a deeply connected, fully engaged relationship with a white-hot sexual connection. How the Dominant expresses his control is based on what has been negotiated, but it is for the benefit of the relationship rather than being purely self-serving, and it is active rather than passive. The Dominant puts his submissive and the relationship first and The Taken In Hand submissive responds positively to her Dominant’s active control.
With that, be good to each other. Explore, learn and grow. Push yourself to be your very best. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.