Perceptions from a Daddy Dom
Perceptions from a Daddy Dom are essays, instruction pieces, and sometimes rants. I write and even text, like I talk in real life and I’m here today speaking from the heart. I offer my opinions and insights that I have gained from fifteen years of experience and through trial and error. If I offer insight, it is from the mindset of my Dominant philosophy, which is primarily that of Daddy Dom. I use the pronouns I am comfortable with, but please swap your pronouns where you feel comfortable. The lifestyle welcomes all of you. Welcome to Wonderland.
I’ve received more than a few requests for the little companion to Daddy is God… or at Least He Should be. Every dynamic is different, so I will try and paint in broad strokes what I think all littles/middles/babygirls and boys should strive for, without invalidating anyone. As always, what works for one, will not work for another. Going forward, to keep things simple and to not have to pen endless characters, I will only be addressing the little title. This is not to exclude middles or babygirls or baby boys. Swap the titles of the roles to fit your needs.
What is a little? In DDlg, a little is at the heart of everything else: submissive. Being submissive can be limited to sex, but in the realm of BDSM, sex isn’t always included. There are non-sexual relationships. A lifestyle submissive versus a bedroom submissive is going to very wildly in how they express their submission, but at the core of who they are, the submissive is consensually obedient and compliant to their partner and is someone that has exchanged part or full control of their daily lives to their Dominant. They crave, need, desire to serve and to be used. They strive to please their Dom in all things, just not sexually. It is not uncommon for a submissive to feel utterly devastated when they perceive a failing or disappoint in their Dominant.
Littles are more than just submissive. Littles also embody the pure childlike youthfulness and innocence of their inner child. They look to their Daddies/Mommies for guidance, leadership and even friendship. They desire to be looked after, cared for, and protected. Some littles age regress. Some littles engage in age play. Some littles do neither. That doesn’t matter. At their core of who they are, they express their truest self with childlike qualities.
Littles should be needy. What? How crazy is that? One of the common worries that you can see a little express is that they’re too needy. To that, I say bullshit. Daddies need your neediness. Through your neediness, you express the need and want for your caregiver. You cannot be too much. It is okay to express it. After a long and hard day, by all means, crawl into your Daddy’s lap and just be. Decompress. Let the worries and stress and fears fade away. What’s that? You think you’re too big for Daddy’s lap? Nonsense. Curl up on the couch or bed and lay your head on his lap. He will play with your hair and let you unwind. You’re home now. You’re safe.
Littles should be expressive. Tell us what you’re feeling. It’s okay to struggle with the words. It’s okay to be non-verbal. You can still relate to us what you’re needing or feeling. Littles, just like Daddies, should be patient and kind. Sometimes, we have a hard time understanding when you reach states on non-verbal expression. Even if we have to turn it into a guessing game, we’ll get to the root of it. Just as much as you want to be cared for, we want to care for you. So tell us. Express yourself how best you can. Tell us about your exciting day. Let us know why you’re sad. Share with your Daddy your inner fears. We’re gonna talk through it. We’ll listen. Your Daddy is going to validate you. And it’s okay to cry. We’ve got tissues, hankies, or you can even soak Daddy’s shirt in your tears. It’s going to be okay.
Littles should be supportive, compassionate and affectionate. Your Daddy needs your help too. Be his safe place. His peace. His happy place. For many Daddies, you are who we will turn to when the world has worn us down. Cuddle him. Lay his head on your lap. Give him all the kisses. You should reciprocate the love your receive from caregiving to your caregiver. Saying thank you goes a long way, showing it goes even further. Use your love languages and show him what he means to you. Through your affection, however you express it, you validate your Daddy.
Good littles include their Daddies in the journeys. A good Daddy is going to want you to show us what you like, are interested in, and what makes you happy. You wanna go on crazy adventures to the zoo or park? So do we! We are just as much invested into your little self as you are and we’re going to support it. Whether it’s helping you achieve your goals or coloring with you in littlespace, we want to be there.
Good littles are good girls. Now, before I get burned at the stake or skewered with a pitchfork, calm down. I’m not saying you can’t be bratty, for those of you that feel the need to brat. That’s not what I’m speaking to. Good littles are good girls. You want to please your Daddy. How you do it is entirely up to you. At the root of DDlg, every little wants their Daddy’s approval. That means there are rules, protocol or structure set in place and those rules are to be followed. The structure that is set in place should always be to support you. To bring your best self out to the forefront. You may not always see it and that’s okay. Your Daddy most certainly does.
DDlg is the most pure, loving and symbiotic lifestyle dynamic I’ve even seen. Both partners need the other so completely and fully to be able to express their true selves and in the expressions of their roles are able to find the fulfillment of their need and love. DDlg is highly individualized and complex when you get into the individual dynamics, but at the end of the day, it boils down to a girl loving her Daddy and a Daddy loving his girl.